A Widow's Ride

“Temporary Home”

Sung by Carrie Underwood

This is my temporary home, it’s not where I belong
Windows and rooms that I’m passing through
This is just a stop on the way to where I’m going
I’m not afraid because I know
This is my temporary home

The last month has been a mad rush with the house going into escrow and set to close by October 10^th.  I haven’t had time to pack since I have been on the road for work for two weeks and then on vacation to the Horizon Unlimited event.  However, I have been blessed to have a wonderful family and friends to help me at the last-minute to move into my new temporary home for the time being until I hit the road.

I’m renting a one bedroom cottage that has dinette area which I converted into my office since I work from home.  The biggest hurdle was getting internet since it is located in a rural area.  Originally, I was concerned that I might not be able to move into this place but thanks to the latest technology, I was able to acquire internet service here.  So basically, the house is a giant cell phone and I need to watch my data usages from now. I guess no more playing “Candy Crush” on Facebook.

In the last week, it has been feeling more and more like home with the personal touches I have been adding to the new place.  I actually feel guilty that this place feels more like home than our previous place. Yeah, yeah, I know that I shouldn’t since our previous place has been in constant renovation mode for the last three years which made it hard to get comfortable in the house.

The other thing that has been hard, it now really feels like that he is truly gone.  Don’t get me wrong, I haven’t been in denial of his death but I have been so busy in the last ten months dealing with the estate that I haven’t had to time to breathe and notice that he is not here anymore.  Now that I’m in the tail end of probate and have more time on my hands, I’m noticing the emptiness.

You may be wondering that since I have sold the house, why aren’t I on the road yet.  Well, I originally was planning to take off last May but since he died without a will, I have to go through probate to settle all of his debts and estate.  This is a lengthy process and takes time.  So I decided to wait until May of 2015 for my trip.  So why May?  Well, we got married on May 14, 2011 and we took off on our honeymoon right after that on our little bike following Route 66.  The holidays and these other significance dates are a difficult time for me and being on a motorcycle helps me get through it and be closer to him in my heart and mind.

So where will be my new home after my trip, I do not know that yet.  However, in time I will figure out where home is meant to be.